What Solo Travelling in my 20s has Taught me...

I don’t look like the ideal solo traveler when you look at me from a distance. I need help putting my luggage in the overhead bin, I’m messy and clumsy, I tend to end up in crazy situations while travelling but you know what solo travelling taught me…

That was all social anxiety. The second I was alone somewhere and I was the only person I knew and I had the only opinion that had a lasting impact on myself… I got it all together. Crazy, I know. And honestly difficult for my family and friends to wrap their minds around but that’s been my experience solo travelling so far. 

I went on my first out of country trip last May, I had a few friends studying abroad in the UK so I decided to go backpack to mooch off their accommodations and friends they met abroad. From there I went to Amsterdam with a few of my longtime best friends from middle school then spent a week in London… alone with my thoughts. 

Let me be so real with you… I freaked myself out a bit when I was alone. I have a lot of anxiety and as a person left alone with that… it took me a couple of days of exploring on my own to get used to it. But after I realized that people live in these places and go about their errands alone all the time, that I felt safe enough to do so. Walking around these major cities was nerve wracking at first but, once I realized that people live here and make it work anyway, I felt okay. And from there I was able to explore and get comfortable doing the touristy things. 

Recently I went on a trip with another one of my longtime best friends from middle school (I know there are at least 5 who I’ve been on trips with) and we went to Portugal and Morocco. Truly two beautiful cities with amazing cultures, foods, and experiences. We (as people who frequent airports during the holidays do) got anxious, fed up with each other, and sick. But it was still one of (if not the) most incredible trips of my life. So not to sound too negative here, but the biggest thing travelling abroad taught me is that you can have fun even if things go wrong. Because we’re all human being, we’re bound to make stupid mistakes while travelling and by travelling with someone you trust (or putting a plan in place that you trust if you’re alone) you can take the necessary precautions to ensure that you have a safe a fun trip. Things are bound to happen, people are bound to get sick, miscalculate the budget, etc… That’s why I plan my trips out so extensively beforehand. 

I make an excel sheet with all of the necessary information like flights, hotels, airbnbs, and booked tours. I make sure I have all of the confirmation numbers, dates, and times in the same place so I can reach it if service is spotty. Then I block out times for exploring the city and wandering around areas that I’ve researched are safe for tourists. It may sound like a lot of work but trust, I put in the work beforehand so I can mentally check out during the trip. Obviously its smart to be aware of your surrounding and to proceed with caution when travelling abroad because any stupid mistakes you make will inevitably cost you more because you’re a foreigner. And I always try to listen to the advice of locals, tour guides, and people who have solo travelled there before just so I know what I’m walking into but my point is. Do all of that research before the trip. Organize all of the information beforehand. So when you’re inevitably waiting for Ryanair to let you check into your flight without cell service and on two bars of data, you don’t need to panic because you already have it saved and sent out to your emergency contacts. God forbid something goes wrong and your emergency contacts need to help you with something from home, they have all the necessary information organized so that at least should be something you don’t have to worry about. 

Being prepared may seem like it feeds anxiety but remember a plan can be in place to fall back on. Not just to strictly adhere to. Just because you planned out every minute of a trip, doesn’t mean you can’t have blocks of time for spontaneous exploration. It also doesn’t mean you can’t change your mind about things once you’re there. So yes as a solo traveler I plan out my trips extensively but I don’t plan on sticking to the plan. I plan on using the plan when I don’t want to make a decision in the moment. When I feel too anxious to go and explore a city where nobody speaks english. When I need an easy activity to help me get accustomed to the cultural shock of leaving the US.